IF YOU COULD...

2007 
 ifyoucould.co.uk

Being a white boy with a circumcised penis, the Beastie Boys were always destined to be the first hip hop I embraced. Although despite my deep love for the five boroughs' finest, one of my biggest regrets is choosing to see them at Wembley Arena instead of a girl called Cat who used to work for Innocent Drinks. You could say that I rather sabotaged my plans for my future happiness that evening.